keep me on

caught in a moment...

@ Friday, June 02, 2006 6/02/2006 11:14:00 PM

"Raymond..."

I knew what people wanted to ask.

"I heard that you are leaving?"

"Yes, I'm leaving on the month of July."

And then I had to explain the details, where I'm going, what I'm going to do, why I'm leaving .

Well, that's the situation... The only thing I hate about this month is that I will be leaving for Aus... for the looongest time. It is nothing like going on vacation to remind me how much I like my home. Leaving home was pretty hard - I knew that it would be. I love family so much and am sad that I will miss so much of my friend's life while I am overseas. I just like being at home, surrounded by my stuff, and able to sleep in my bed. I love my bed. I have so many good friends here... I can't imagine not seeing all of them every day... i wouldn't know what to do with my weekends and my meals now... It's scary. I'm sad about leaving M'sia, especially not knowing when I'll be back. I'm sure I *will* be back to this country at some point, but I know that at the very least it's not going to be for a few years.. It's just that I'm on the 'edge' of leaving, I'm not sure what's more scary... I do know, however, that it feels like time paces up when you try to just absorb your surroundings because you're leaving them and don't dare miss a single second. I'm worried about forgetting. I'm worried about being forgotten. But mostly I'm worried about taking this jump from something so certain and known into something totally new … That's part of what makes it fun, of course. The challenge. Worrying and then jumping...I can't put into words just how big an adjustment it will be for me...I think I'm running out of time... =..( *cry a little*

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